3/2 - Lao-Thai Relativity
Back in Thailand now, and I'm somewhat relieved. That says a lot about Thailand, considering how much exhaust fumes I'm breathing in daily, and how close I am at any given moment to getting hit by a sawngthaew (truck with benches in back, Chiang Mai's answer to the public bus.) The urban chaos in Chiang Mai is on a much smaller and more manageable scale than it was in Bangkok, but coming here I was expecting a slightly less 'city-like' atmosphere, so it's been a bit of a shock after laid-back Laos. Nevertheless, our guesthouse is happily located on one of the many quiet and tiny soi (alleys) where not many vehicles venture, there's good food all around (including delicious Hill-tribe coffee), movie theaters available for combatting the heat of the day (we saw 'Constantine' yesterday, which was quite good fun), and as a result it looks as if we'll end up being tempted into just chilling out here until we have to be in Bangkok on the 10th for our flight out towards Ireland. I say 'towards' because we're taking Emirates Airlines (a moment of joy for me, as I've always hoped to try them out) via Dubai to London, where we'll stay overnight at the airport in order to catch our early morning easyJet flight to Cork (another airline I've never tried but have wanted to). Tell me, do I use too many parentheses? I feel it may be getting out of hand.
In any case, it was three days of fairly hard travelling to get from Luang Phabang to Chiang Mai, two of which were on the slow boat, and one on a bus. This included overnights in Pakbeng and Huay Xai, which should really be written Houei Sai in case you were interested. Pakbeng was kind of cool because it was really the most in-the-middle-of-nowhere place we've been. Electricity there is by generator for about four hours a night, and it basically exists to support river traffic on the Mekong. It's one of the only places along the stretch of river we travelled on where there's a road leading north, so it's important for that reason too.
Aubrie has promised to make a post elaborating on the slow boat experience, but I'll simply state that it was worthwhile but quite uncomfortable. The boats that we rode on, for 9 hours 15 minutes the first day and for 8 hours 30 minutes the second, were long wooden things with a roof and big openings between the side wall and roof that allowed for lots of air and great views out. Seating was in the form of cramped wooden benches with small pads on them, which became distinctly uncomfortable after about an hour. It was necessary to alternate between various sitting and standing positions constantly to not go crazy. Luckily I was into a book, which I read for many hours, and somehow the time passed. The river was all jagged rocky outcroppings, which are supposedly quite treacherous in the wet season, as they're covered over. It being the dry season, the driver, seemingly with a mental under-water map of the entire course, weaved and swerved around invisible obstacles in the river, taking us close to the left bank one minute, and back towards the right bank another. Along the way were people bathing and sifting for things in the rocks and sand, and a number of herds of water buffalo, usually in the configuration of: two bathing, one standing with hooves in the water, and seven on the sandy beach, swatting flies. Give or take a few. The main thing this made us wonder was, is there such a thing as wild cattle/buffalo? It was hard to imagine. They seem so slow and non-mobile, and I'm so tied into the notion that you only ever see such animals on a farm, where they're always owned and looked after by someone, that it seemed outrageous to imagine these buffalo walking through the forest, bedding down for the night in a herd, living out their lives in constant leisure on the beaches of the Mekong....but I suppose it's possible. Other highlights included: a man on the boat collapsing in an apparent seizure, a troop of Swedish backpackers all with matching black Gameboys, Aubrie trying to get up the impossibly steep and sandy hills leading up to Pakbeng town on a still-sore foot, me carrying both bags up a portion of the steep and sandy hills, and a man who turned his camcorder on himself and filmed himself for twenty minutes, rotating periodically so as to get every angle possible of background visuals. But now I've gone on too long with this....
Here I will ask- is it terrible of me to have missed 7-Eleven while in Laos? 7-Eleven is a slightly different phenomenon in Asia than in the US. Something about it is better. It's much better stocked, the staff are happier, it offers a range of useful services. And I'm addicted to the Thai iced tea they have there. Admittedly, 7-Eleven is at its absolute peak in Japan, where it's more like a gourmet deli, but the Thailand version certainly comes close. In any case, I should have really appreciated the fact that there's not a chain store in site in Laos, and I did, really. How many places in the world can you go now where there's no McDonalds, after all? But towards the end of our time there, I found myself wanting to visit a major cineplex, and of course, to go get a drink in a 7-Eleven. And so when I saw one after crossing the river into Thailand, I sighed with relief, and then immediately felt a little disgusted by myself. Unfortunately, I have both sides to me--that which hates the rampant spread of chain stores and their tendency towards sameness and global domination, and that which enjoys the sameness, as much as I don't want to. It may be something that many of us struggle with, though I'm not sure to what degree.
And speaking of sameness, all of the markets, in Luang Phabang and here, where they sell various 'native' products and traditional goods, including the ubiquitous Singha and Chang beer t-shirts, including a lot of very nice stuff at great prices, have one terrible problem. All the products seem exactly identical. At every single one of the dozens, even hundreds, of stalls, you can tell that the same twenty or thirty products are being sold, and they all appear to have been made by the same exact person or company. There are even products here that are also in Laos, which seems even less likely. It's as if all the individual makers of these products got together at some point and decided that they would work out which of their products were selling best to tourists, and that they would then only make those products, according to a very specific model. It's depressing. And in a way, it's a lot like what's happening in the world with the spread of globalization. It would seem that this total lack of individuality is what people want in their products, that mass-production by machines is the ideal in the minds of the people of the world. And I only help this trend when I go to 7-Eleven or buy a book at Borders. In any case, I want to be able to spend a day looking at all the different stalls and seeing what different people are making and/or selling, then find the one I like best, and know that there is no identical copy of what I've bought. Sadly, it doesn't seem possible, at least in the major cities.
Something about Thailand is really great though, despite all of that, and it's difficult to figure out what exactly. I just really enjoy being here. One interesting thing to note is that after Laos, Thailand feels fairly normal to me, whereas clearly, if I had just stepped off a plane from New York in Thailand, it would feel alien and strange. One has reached an odd point in relative reality when Thailand feels like returning to 'normalcy'. And in this case, I mean 'normalcy' as defined by what I'm used to and consider normal. The bus ride to Chiang Mai, lasting six hours and on an aging old bus with terribly small seats, stopping often and lumbering up hills, picking up random people on the side of deserted roads, felt almost like your every-day average bus ride, even though it was far from that. I suppose this is a combination of Laos being 'less normal' and the fact that we've been travelling for some time now. It's been interesting to observe, in any case.
I'd really like to go and have some contact with an elephant before I leave here, but I'm not sure if it'll be worthwhile even if I attempt it. I'd very much like to just hang out with an elephant for a bit, but most of what's offered around here seems to be elephant rides, which I generally find to be demeaning to the animal. If someone would let me just get up on its neck and ride it, I might like to do that, but as it is, they usually stick a chair up there and tie it to the elephant, and it doesn't look like it's very comfortable for the elephant, not to mention that it puts you at a distance from it, so that it's more like getting on an amusement park ride, and less about communing with the elephant. But we're going to look into the options. In the meantime, we're planning on catching up on some films. Chiang Mai is a good deal hotter than Laos was, even at night, so it's a worthwhile escape from the midday sun, and it costs a staggeringly cheap $1.75 for a ticket. I suppose we have to see "Million Dollar Baby" now, even though I didn't think it looked so great. I thought "The Aviator", which we saw in Singapore, was clearly going to win, and so I feel a bit like the former cheated the latter. But I should really have seen both to make that claim.
As for the ugly dolls, Kurt, there can be no adequate explanation. The photo merely depicts our cash and the dolls, with no connection implied between the two. They are companions, and pillows, and cost about 300,000 Kip each, though they were bought in New York.
I'd also like to take this moment to denounce Washington Mutual Bank, who charge exorbitant fees when Aubrie takes out money here (I'm with Citibank, the ultimate mega-corporation, but at least withdrawals are free). Their latest stunt has been to charge her a "Balance-Inquiry Fee" with each withdrawal as well, even when she hasn't made an Inquiry, citing that the ATMs must inquire the balance before dispensing the cash. Amazing, right? I urge anyone considering the bank to boycott it, and if anyone is nearby a branch, random acts of minor violence against the property are appreciated. No hurting people though, please. They probably don't deserve it.
In any case, it was three days of fairly hard travelling to get from Luang Phabang to Chiang Mai, two of which were on the slow boat, and one on a bus. This included overnights in Pakbeng and Huay Xai, which should really be written Houei Sai in case you were interested. Pakbeng was kind of cool because it was really the most in-the-middle-of-nowhere place we've been. Electricity there is by generator for about four hours a night, and it basically exists to support river traffic on the Mekong. It's one of the only places along the stretch of river we travelled on where there's a road leading north, so it's important for that reason too.
Aubrie has promised to make a post elaborating on the slow boat experience, but I'll simply state that it was worthwhile but quite uncomfortable. The boats that we rode on, for 9 hours 15 minutes the first day and for 8 hours 30 minutes the second, were long wooden things with a roof and big openings between the side wall and roof that allowed for lots of air and great views out. Seating was in the form of cramped wooden benches with small pads on them, which became distinctly uncomfortable after about an hour. It was necessary to alternate between various sitting and standing positions constantly to not go crazy. Luckily I was into a book, which I read for many hours, and somehow the time passed. The river was all jagged rocky outcroppings, which are supposedly quite treacherous in the wet season, as they're covered over. It being the dry season, the driver, seemingly with a mental under-water map of the entire course, weaved and swerved around invisible obstacles in the river, taking us close to the left bank one minute, and back towards the right bank another. Along the way were people bathing and sifting for things in the rocks and sand, and a number of herds of water buffalo, usually in the configuration of: two bathing, one standing with hooves in the water, and seven on the sandy beach, swatting flies. Give or take a few. The main thing this made us wonder was, is there such a thing as wild cattle/buffalo? It was hard to imagine. They seem so slow and non-mobile, and I'm so tied into the notion that you only ever see such animals on a farm, where they're always owned and looked after by someone, that it seemed outrageous to imagine these buffalo walking through the forest, bedding down for the night in a herd, living out their lives in constant leisure on the beaches of the Mekong....but I suppose it's possible. Other highlights included: a man on the boat collapsing in an apparent seizure, a troop of Swedish backpackers all with matching black Gameboys, Aubrie trying to get up the impossibly steep and sandy hills leading up to Pakbeng town on a still-sore foot, me carrying both bags up a portion of the steep and sandy hills, and a man who turned his camcorder on himself and filmed himself for twenty minutes, rotating periodically so as to get every angle possible of background visuals. But now I've gone on too long with this....
Here I will ask- is it terrible of me to have missed 7-Eleven while in Laos? 7-Eleven is a slightly different phenomenon in Asia than in the US. Something about it is better. It's much better stocked, the staff are happier, it offers a range of useful services. And I'm addicted to the Thai iced tea they have there. Admittedly, 7-Eleven is at its absolute peak in Japan, where it's more like a gourmet deli, but the Thailand version certainly comes close. In any case, I should have really appreciated the fact that there's not a chain store in site in Laos, and I did, really. How many places in the world can you go now where there's no McDonalds, after all? But towards the end of our time there, I found myself wanting to visit a major cineplex, and of course, to go get a drink in a 7-Eleven. And so when I saw one after crossing the river into Thailand, I sighed with relief, and then immediately felt a little disgusted by myself. Unfortunately, I have both sides to me--that which hates the rampant spread of chain stores and their tendency towards sameness and global domination, and that which enjoys the sameness, as much as I don't want to. It may be something that many of us struggle with, though I'm not sure to what degree.
And speaking of sameness, all of the markets, in Luang Phabang and here, where they sell various 'native' products and traditional goods, including the ubiquitous Singha and Chang beer t-shirts, including a lot of very nice stuff at great prices, have one terrible problem. All the products seem exactly identical. At every single one of the dozens, even hundreds, of stalls, you can tell that the same twenty or thirty products are being sold, and they all appear to have been made by the same exact person or company. There are even products here that are also in Laos, which seems even less likely. It's as if all the individual makers of these products got together at some point and decided that they would work out which of their products were selling best to tourists, and that they would then only make those products, according to a very specific model. It's depressing. And in a way, it's a lot like what's happening in the world with the spread of globalization. It would seem that this total lack of individuality is what people want in their products, that mass-production by machines is the ideal in the minds of the people of the world. And I only help this trend when I go to 7-Eleven or buy a book at Borders. In any case, I want to be able to spend a day looking at all the different stalls and seeing what different people are making and/or selling, then find the one I like best, and know that there is no identical copy of what I've bought. Sadly, it doesn't seem possible, at least in the major cities.
Something about Thailand is really great though, despite all of that, and it's difficult to figure out what exactly. I just really enjoy being here. One interesting thing to note is that after Laos, Thailand feels fairly normal to me, whereas clearly, if I had just stepped off a plane from New York in Thailand, it would feel alien and strange. One has reached an odd point in relative reality when Thailand feels like returning to 'normalcy'. And in this case, I mean 'normalcy' as defined by what I'm used to and consider normal. The bus ride to Chiang Mai, lasting six hours and on an aging old bus with terribly small seats, stopping often and lumbering up hills, picking up random people on the side of deserted roads, felt almost like your every-day average bus ride, even though it was far from that. I suppose this is a combination of Laos being 'less normal' and the fact that we've been travelling for some time now. It's been interesting to observe, in any case.
I'd really like to go and have some contact with an elephant before I leave here, but I'm not sure if it'll be worthwhile even if I attempt it. I'd very much like to just hang out with an elephant for a bit, but most of what's offered around here seems to be elephant rides, which I generally find to be demeaning to the animal. If someone would let me just get up on its neck and ride it, I might like to do that, but as it is, they usually stick a chair up there and tie it to the elephant, and it doesn't look like it's very comfortable for the elephant, not to mention that it puts you at a distance from it, so that it's more like getting on an amusement park ride, and less about communing with the elephant. But we're going to look into the options. In the meantime, we're planning on catching up on some films. Chiang Mai is a good deal hotter than Laos was, even at night, so it's a worthwhile escape from the midday sun, and it costs a staggeringly cheap $1.75 for a ticket. I suppose we have to see "Million Dollar Baby" now, even though I didn't think it looked so great. I thought "The Aviator", which we saw in Singapore, was clearly going to win, and so I feel a bit like the former cheated the latter. But I should really have seen both to make that claim.
As for the ugly dolls, Kurt, there can be no adequate explanation. The photo merely depicts our cash and the dolls, with no connection implied between the two. They are companions, and pillows, and cost about 300,000 Kip each, though they were bought in New York.
I'd also like to take this moment to denounce Washington Mutual Bank, who charge exorbitant fees when Aubrie takes out money here (I'm with Citibank, the ultimate mega-corporation, but at least withdrawals are free). Their latest stunt has been to charge her a "Balance-Inquiry Fee" with each withdrawal as well, even when she hasn't made an Inquiry, citing that the ATMs must inquire the balance before dispensing the cash. Amazing, right? I urge anyone considering the bank to boycott it, and if anyone is nearby a branch, random acts of minor violence against the property are appreciated. No hurting people though, please. They probably don't deserve it.
posted by Gabriel Leigh at 6:24 PM
2 Comments:
Dear Gabe:
You do indeed have a love, bordering on mania, of flight and its attendant hardware. What specifically about Emirates Airlines do you think might evince joy in you? Not being sarcastic or critical, just curious.
A handful of asanas, the stretching poses of hatha yoga, which can be done standing, sitting, or squatting, with an economy of movement unlikely to attract attention from those around you, are very helpful in combatting the frustration of cramped, uncomfortable spaces.
"...disgusted with (not by) myself," of course you meant to say. But fret not: you are automatically granted seven to 11 stops at said establishments in recompense for the arduous nature of your travels.
The Washington Mutual remarks put me in a quandary. Corporate greed bordering on malfeasance, from the evidence you cite; my problem, however, is that I bought some shares of it (100, I think) a year or so ago for my I.R.A. because of its 4.56% dividend payments (having sworn off mutual funds, which frequently tend to charge that much in management fees when all is said and done, at little profit to the shareholder). Hmm...... there's always something new to despise about our rulers, isn't there?
Parentheses, by the way, when skillfully deployed, are an aid to the reader (as are commas). When a writer's prose flows smoothly (as the elder Leigh's so often does--and yours, young Master G. shows every sign of doing, as well) and where the meaning is unambiguous (unless intentionally so), less punctuation can be better, even. Don't you think?
As for consorting with an elephant, my theory is that animals, if they haven't been too mistreated by humans, when approached with sensitivity and respect will respond in kind -- unless the animal in question is ravenous and you smell like prey. Not that I've had much face time with pachyderms, mind you, so take my remarks along with some ammonia salts, in case the big one's aroma is as heady as its skin is thick.
John E.
(p.s. Looking forward, Aubrie, to your Slow-Boat-to-an-Asian-Country post.)
Dear Gabe & Gimp,
How are you doing? I'm writing this from jail. I'm glad they have DSL in all the cells now. I got picked up for vandalism. I kept telling them I was only following orders but they didn't buy it. I have another torture session in a few minutes. If they do anything worse than they did the last time (a half hour ago) I'll have to name names. The names I'd name, of course, are yours. I'll tell them it was you who enlisted me to do some minor damage to any Washington Mutuals I came upon. Was it my fault I came upon one on the way home from C-town, a dozen eggs in one of my plastic bags? No, serendipity should be behind bars. In any event, I egged the bank, broke some windows, cleaned out the safe, &c. I would've gotten away but Virginia was lollygagging, claiming that her licking up the eggs had nothing to do with taste, that she was only trying to get rid of the evidence. What does she care, she ran like a cougar when the fuzz arrived. I was left standing there like an idiot. Don't worry about me, though. I'll beat this rap and land on my feet. Just don't incite me to do any other dumb things. Yeah, don't get me involved anymore in your ongoing duel with America's banking system.
As far as the 7-eleven conundrum goes, you've got nothing to feel terrible about. It's a normal reaction. It happens to me when I'm out on the road. I always think I'm gonna stay in some non-franchised motel, a real dive, live the life of squalor like a true dirt-poor troubadour. Or maybe I'll sleep in my van like my hardcore hillbilly-for-your-head friends do. Yeah, just me and my dog underneath the tin roof underneath the stars. Well, this dream deteriorates (or is upgraded) rather quickly when it's pitch black and lonesome and scary and I begin to long for anything that will remind me I'm even tenuously linked to the web of humanity. What serves this purpose nicely in said situation is laying in bed watching ESPN in a Best Western or a Hampton Inn.
Keep using parenthesis. It makes it very clear which parts of the sentences I'm supposed to execute first. For instance ... due to fatigue, you'll just have to imagine an ingenious parenthetical sentence here that somehow manages to reference the mathematical distributive property I learned in junior high school.
The metaphorical meaning of the ugly dolls photograph was quite clear to me. I was surprised they let you post that one on the blog site, the implications were so filthy dirty.
Aubrie, keep close watch on my cousin for the next few days. I don't want him communing with no elephants out there.
Love (and kisses), Rand(y)((all) (Leigh))
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